Somehow we are expecting again. Although I said I would never, ever do this again. This baby was very much planned for and we are very excited. Darren especially at this time, as I am the lucky one who gets to go through all the nausea, vomiting, dizziness, weight gain, mood changes, lack of sleep, weak bladder and at the end of it all, labor. I will never be one of those women who are able to say," I loved being pregnant!" I could not understand something less than that sentence, for that has not been my experience or my reality. Yet when all is said and done I would not change the fact that I get to create life. I get to feel a new baby, my new baby growing and kicking inside me. I share my life with them from the very moment they are conceived. It is the most incredible thing I have ever experienced in my life. I have to believe that somehow the sacrifice that we as women make to do this most amazing work, all the pain and trial bond us to that child in a way I'm not sure that we can always comprehend. On a very small scale it reminds me of the great sacrifice of our Savior. At those moments when you just want to crawl into a ball and disappear, losing sight of the end reward, it is hard to maintain a positive attitude. It is hard not to feel sorry for oneself and fall into despair. Somehow I need to though. Remembering the suffering that my savior went through for me and the suffering I am going through for this piece of heaven is the most wonderful kind of labor, a labor of love.